Saturday, September 26, 2009

The Happiest Day of My Life


Given as an exercise in class to speak on ‘The Happiest Day of My Life’, such a simple thing it seemed but it wasn’t so.

HAPPINESS, such a bright and vibrant word it is. The first thing I remember about being happy is me as a kid standing with my brightest smile and my mom handing me a chocolate and asking, “Are you happy now?” and me nodding yes :)

But what is being happy, smile and satisfaction u feel after sleeping two more hours on a winter morning, meeting an old friend and catching up with the same pace as if nothing has changed or watching someone smile. Happiness for me is a feeling, which when you feel want to keep feeling it.

Over the course of my life, I have experienced many days of happiness, each one giving me a unique experience. But happiness is something I consider intangible; it can just be felt and cannot be measured.

So when questioned that which day of my life was the happiest day of my life, I simply can’t answer.

Was it the joy of getting my first cycle at the age of 8 or the days of the results on which I was being praised for being a ranker, or the day when I first time prepared tea for my dad and he rewarded being best in world.

Or was it the elation of being an adult on my 18th birthday and moreover getting a license so that I could drive.

Or was it the days of fun and freedom of bunking classes, enjoying mumbai rains, chatting, laughing and just being together with friends.

May its the day my di gave birth to a angelic baby and became a proud mother after so many complications.

May be, a day before yesterday was the happiest day of my life when i chatted with my bhai till 1 at night, it was so relaxing, it felt really great of being thought and cared about.

These feelings of relaxation, satisfaction, expression, achievement, being praised, being loved, freedom is happiness for me.

So each passing day, brings happiness to me in different shades, the feelings and emotion which i want to feel again and again. I think it's just not one, instead i'm blessed with soo many happy days and many more yet to come.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Change

It has been really long, I haven’t written anything, I have but nothing which I could publish on blog. Writing is something which I can never leave be it my exams or anything, it’s completely a stress buster and it sometimes helps me to understand myself.

Running through the pages of statistics, which was my first exam, life seemed so calculative, so practical, and I being a sentimental person, cried a lot as I couldn’t bear that practicality in my life. My best friends (who are my degree college friends) forgot to wish me luck for my so important my PG exams. And I was really upset when I was getting wishes from all those people from whom I didn’t even expect as whenever my phone rang or a sms beeped I really thought it must be both of them but they weren’t. Just one thought how they can forget my exams; they have never done this before.

You might think it’s so stupid of me to think so, even I thought the same, but it’s not so, I soon realized it wasn’t that they didn’t wished me but it was I wasn’t getting something which I expected. Just imagine, a person who’s really dear to you, and is always the first one to wish you on your birthday, and on one of yours birthdays that person is not even the last one to wish you, you feel so ignored, with same sensation I was going through. I realized this it wasn’t there mistake, it was me, who was expecting, and an expectation truly kills you at times. One of my friend, made me realize of my weakness and that was more worse, I was told I ruin things because I live in past and future, and never for present, and I was forced to give a thought to it. The lines which punched me harder were, “ Things change, once you have let something apart and people who are so far from you are bound too loose that attachment, you are not the same for them now, so better don’t expect from them, live in present, and enjoy what you have today.” And I was just listening to this, and it just seemed that I’m being preached. Even today such a change is not acceptable by me, if I don’t change for them why should they change on my part, but I guess even on this part I’m wrong, as it is said, nothing in this world is constant what is constant is CHANGE.

Life seems like a thread containing small beads, as you move further you acquire some new beads but the thread can hold only few beads it just can’t be overloaded so you need to detach those old beads and just hold on the new ones. Though my life has capacity to hold so many beads, so I won’t be detaching my old friends, but I understand, they have their own lives, tensions and new friends, so they might forget me at times, but I’m still there someone in the corner of their minds and hearts with those melodious moments of being together, and I’m cent percent sure of this, as they don’t have guts to forget me more than this, as they know they won’t be spared :p